Cruise right on out of here

I was pretty ticked at Paramount Pictures about a decade ago when they ended their agreement with Full Moon Pictures, the low-budget horror film company behind the cheezily awesome films Puppetmaster, Dollman, Trancers, Demonic Toys and other.
But now that Paramount has canned Tom Cruise, I have one thing to say.
Paramount—we’re all good.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Tom Cruise is a nut.
Not only should he no longer be allowed to make anymore movies, all of his roles should go to Billy Zane. Now there’s a guy that can act (better than Tom Cruise).
Tom, if I may quote a long-deceased television gameshow, you are the weakest link. Goodbye!

(Look out Tom Cruise! Paramount executives are trying to get ya! Picture courtesy of Paramount Pictures and MI:3)